The Eight Steps of a Stalker, and Defenses
Specifically addresses psychopathic individual stalkers,
but elements apply to organized or gang stalking as wellby H. Michael Sweeney, copyright © 2011, ProparanoidPress, all rights reserved edited from original versions in The Professional Paranoid and The Professional Paranoid Defensive Field Guide permissions to reproduce available on request to pppbooks at comcast (net) Dateline Portland, OR Sept 27, 2011
My Professional Paranoid series of (3) books are a kind of ‘how to’ in the realm of privacy and security issue problem solving. The key to solving a problem is, of course, knowing about it in the first place. Thus all my material includes how to detect the problem. Follows are the things everyone, and especially women, should know about stalking (which is one reason why, for simplicity’s sake, the steps are presented as if a woman is being stalked by a man). But stalking is definitely not limited to female victims or male stalkers. Ask David Letterman, which points additionally to the fact that stalking can be about something other than just sex.
Fame or circumstance can be the prime motivation for stalking, even circumstance as simple as cutting someone off on the freeway. They follow you home, and plot their campaign of insanity against you. And it is a plot, well thought out, and by someone typically of great intellect. For some reason, the psychopath tends to be a brilliant thinking in all respects but the most basic of logic paths associated with social reasoning.
Internet Stalking can also follow the model to a degree, but is commonly a bit harder to detect and significantly harder to deal with while it is a such a remote level, one typically anonymous to the nth degree. The danger is, of course, that the Web stalker may escalate at some point to a physical or real-World stalker.
From my books, with minimal editing:
A stalker will…
1 Study and learn to know the victim: observe and learn as much as possible before planning the attack.
So be alert, be inconsistent! Observe those at the periphery of your daily doings and keep watch for repeat presence, especially if overly interested in your activities. Try not to establish patterns, and whenever possible, go out of your way to change regular habits.
2 Make contact: find an excuse to get close enough for conversation, if possible, something irresistible to the victim (i.e., involving victim’s pet, hobby, project, etc.):
So end conversations with strangers quickly! Turn cold and hostile if polite excuses fail. If there is any further insistence of any kind, do not warn that you will call for help, DO IT! If needed, follow instructions in item five.
3 Lower victim’s defenses: be friendly and charming, control dialog.
So don’t let them get past step 2! End it! Be especially wary of very charming and flattering, talkative types.
4 Obligate and gain trust: endears himself to the victim, perhaps by some task or favor which indebts the victim, preferably an ongoing task which involves going with the victim to a more private place, such as carrying groceries.
Again, don’t let them get past step 2!
5 Isolate: isolate the victim using trust gained, always ready to counter possible objections by clever whimsy or logic. Seek a place where no one else can hear or see.
So run! Drop everything, scream, and run. Do whatever it takes to draw unwanted attention and then, to play safe, get witnesses contact information. Call Police.
6 Attack! In their mind, this may simply mean ‘romancing you,’ but no matter how gentle, it is an unwanted assault on your person. But many stalkers ‘loose it’ in the moment and violence ends up being the final expression of their feelings. So no matter how gentle it may start, it can quickly escalate to something else.
So defend yourself! Fight back to the best of your ability (hopefully improved with martial arts or weapon’s training). Remember, the perp will expect you to wilt with fear (or succumb to charm), perhaps to break into tears and become a human vegetable. Fight back fiercely, suddenly, and without warning, no holds barred, screaming and kicking all the way. Break windows, knock over furniture, honk horns, anything to draw attention. Do whatever it takes to be his worst nightmare.
7 Eliminate evidence: hide, take, or destroy all evidence, including the victim in worst case scenarios.
So observe everything! Note details about face, clothes, vehicles: get license numbers, scratch skin or pull hair in struggles (get DNA sample, mark them with scars), get a button from clothing, etc.
8 Escape: make good a retreat without detection.
So thwart escape (where safe)! If possible WITHOUT FURTHER CONFRONTATION, get witnesses, damage vehicle to make it stand out and need repair, inflict a wound that will require medical treatment or force a limp, bandage. REPORT THE CRIME. There is no guilt in being a victim, ever. If any law enforcement officer or medical staff member treats you with other than respect, immediately ask to speak to their supervisor and have someone else assigned, file an official complaint, and go public about that treatment, if necessary, to get that person fired or reprimanded. They have no business being in their line of work. You may even wish to consult a lawyer about a suit for emotional damages.
Anyone who feels they are being stalked should at the earliest opportunity to present useful information speak with Police. Useful information would be descriptions, time, place, witnesses, event details. In the absence of too many such informational elements, Police will not even be moved to file a report. The GOAL is to have a report filed, not to have the matter ended, because such information is rarely actual evidence nor is it condemning enough to warrant investigation or arrest.
But it MIGHT result in the deterrence of a Police interview of the suspect, and DOES result in documentation of the problem which, with continued reports, will build a case for stalking to the point where, hopefully, an arrest and prosecution can take place. Without such a history, a single report, even if involving violence, will not necessarily result in arrest. Police need a LOT of information and detail before they can act usefully.
It is also suggested that you email me for additional advice. I offer a free helps kit and two weeks of consulting which can make a big difference in how things progress, as well as the final outcome. Email proparanoid at comcast (net).
- You: Stalking victims failed by the law (guardian.co.uk)
- Dealing with a Stalker Your Own Personal Terrorist (socyberty.com)
- Profiling a Stalker (lachapelleinteriors.wordpress.com)
- System ‘lets down stalking victims’ (mirror.co.uk)